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Each Anniversary is Another Milestone!

Recently my husband and I celebrated our 38th anniversary. We were both very young when we were married, I was only 17 and my husband was 18. The best advice given to me was from my soon to be mother-in-law. I’ll never forget her words…she said, “if you’re getting married with a back door policy then you have no business getting married.” Through all the ups and downs we’ve shared ~ having a back door policy was never an option. I’m so proud of the man I married. He has given me a love that I cherish everyday and I know without a shadow of doubt just how lucky I am. I just can’t help lovin that man of mine!!!
Most Hollywood couples don’t make it but somehow Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward managed to stay together. I don’t know whether or not it’s really true that he wrote the following letter to his wife on their wedding day…but does it really matter? It’s still a beautiful and profound message just the same. 
Paul Newman’s letter to his wife on their wedding day

“Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the Art of Marriage, the little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say ‘I love you’ at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon; it should continue through all the years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have the wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding rooms for things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.”

Here Comes That Rainy Day Feel’n

It’s been an extremely wet week here in Georgia, which promises to also be a wet 4th of July. I found some of these pix on pinterest and others from around the net. They are all here to express the joy of a summer rain fall and to serve as a reminder of how good it feels to play in the rain. There is joy, laughter, dance, and romance…everything to make you feel bubbly or butterflies…take your pick.

Disclaimer: Nothing here is intended to infringe on anyone’s copyright. Some pix contain a link-back to its original website. However I couldn’t always find the original sours. If you are the original owner and would like your photo removed, please send me a gentle email and it will be removed no questions asked.

Walking in the rainCopenhagen rain (by Frans Peter Verheyen)Dancing in the rainMagicA sad goodbye!Kiss me in the pouring rain♥Big StrideRainCute Rainy Day WeddingLong walks in the rain... ♥Don't rain on my paradeGreat picture!Glee

For Better, For Worse. In Sickness and In Health

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It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80’s arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he
needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.

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He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease.

As we talked, I asked,‘Will she be upset if you’re late?’ He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

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Surprised, I asked, ‘And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?’

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, ‘She doesn’t know who I am, but I still know who she is!’

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I had to hold back tears as he left. I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, ‘That is the kind of love I want in my life.’

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Loving ‘for better or for worse’ means being committed to each other in every season and circumstance of life. True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.

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‘Life isn’t about how to survive the storm,

But how to dance in the rain.’

We are all getting Older. Tomorrow may be our turn.

~Author Unknown

http://jolenes-cuppajo.blogspot.com

The Things We Do for Love

(written by a very dear personal friend of mine….Jo)

Last month I was talking to a friend about what he was doing and how his life was shaking out. He told me he finally got the Corvette he always wanted. I asked him why he waited so long since money was not an issue. He responded by saying that the woman he was with at this time liked fast cars so now he had another reason to get one. It made me laugh, he was finally getting his dream but had to justify his purchase not for love of himself but to gain love from someone else. We all get a little crazy when it comes to love and what we will do for it. The list is extensive: plastic surgery, clothes, body-building, dieting, fast cars, hair cuts, presents, perfume, all in the name of love. Maybe the cultures that have arranged marriages have it all figured out, after all studies show that those marriages last considerably longer than the ones based on someone having a fast car or the sculpted body.

What is real, long-lasting love based on? Friendship, knowing and trusting the other person, someone who’ll stick by you when the tough times hit, kindness, a sense of humor, empathy, attitude, and common interests make for enduring love; it is not based on the quick knee-jerk attraction that heats up our ego but fails to melt our hearts.

We each desire different elements to make the love connection; tall, short, big, little, blond, brunette, green eyes, blue eyes all are preferences but that often goes out the window when someone with that special chemistry shows up in our life, never mind the fast car, the nice clothes….that is passé compared to the elusive attraction elixir called chemistry. Many of my radio guests who billboard themselves as relationship advisors and scientists studying this charismatic energy, believe that it is the hidden vibration we all have that operates at one speed or another and when someone comes into our life that vibrates at the same energy level well that’s all she wrote…the click happens and we are putty in the other person’s arms. I know some entrepreneurs would like to find out just how to bottle this and market it as the “love potion” but thank the stars that it cannot be trapped, altered or contained; it is magic and elusive but when it is there it is potent and all manner of willpower needs to be gathered to overcome that attraction. We may wish we are pragmatic but logic often is not as powerful as this potion; we become the lovesick fool.

When we have a love dry spell we often choose to simulate the high of falling in love by eating chocolate, the traditional Valentine drug of choice, that punches up our serotonin, the feel good hormone. If we are not in love at the moment, chocolate seems to fill the gap but only temporarily…we all still hold out for the real thing.

Love has many agendas; the Queen of Sheba sailed across the sea to King Solomon with the sole purpose of seducing him. It worked and the match produced a son who ruled Ethiopia during its greatest empire. Napoleon returned from war excited to see his beloved Josephine who he often asked not to bath before his arrival so he could remember her sweet scent that reminded him of violets. Antony and Cleopatra could not stand to be separated, so much so that they lost their lives and empires to love. The debate still continues was it lust or love? Shakespeare wrote many stories about unrequited loves that were based on observing events of his time. Romeo and Juliet, like many young lovers, both then and now, were willing to face the wrath of their families and death…all for love.

It doesn’t get any easier today. When we get our hearts broken, we cry, we wish we were not fools, we close our self off from the world, get angry, and often we border on hysteria then like eternal optimists we jump right back into the fray…all for the sake of love.

Today, Valentines Day, celebrates the ecstasy of eros, the pleasure and pain of relationships, the enchantment of love and it reminds us that love, that rare and treasured elixir, may be just around the next corner or discovered right before our eyes!

Happy Valentines
Linda

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copyright © Linda Strasburg2010. Feel free to forward, but please include this section.

You can hear Linda’s radio program streaming live on the Internet called InterViews & InterActions every Saturday afternoon 2PM MST. at http://www.k-talk.com/

The Difference Between Men and Women

Let’s say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they’re driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: “Do you realize that, as of tonight, we’ve been seeing each other for exactly six months?”

And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he’s been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I’m trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn’t want, or isn’t sure of.

And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.

And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I’m not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I’d have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward . . . I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

And Roger is thinking: . . . so that means it was . . . let’s see . . ..February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer’s, which means . . . lemme check the odometer . . . Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

And Elaine is thinking: He’s upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I’m reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed — even before I sensed it — that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that’s it. That’s why he’s so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He’s afraid of being rejected.

And Roger is thinking: And I’m gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don’t care what those morons say, it’s still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It’s 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a damn garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.

And Elaine is thinking: He’s angry. And I don’t blame him. I’d be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can’t help the way I feel. I’m just not sure.

And Roger is thinking: They’ll probably say it’s only a 90- day warranty. That’s exactly what they’re gonna say, the scumballs.

And Elaine is thinking: Maybe I’m just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I’m sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I’ll give them a damn warranty. I’ll take their warranty and stick it right up their …. . .

“Roger,” Elaine says aloud.

“What?” says Roger, startled.

“Please don’t torture yourself like this,” she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. “Maybe I should never have . . Oh God, I feel so . …. . ”

(She breaks down, sobbing.)

“What?” says Roger.

“I’m such a fool,” Elaine sobs. “I mean, I know there’s no knight. I really know that. It’s silly. There’s no knight, and there’s no horse.”

“There’s no horse?” says Roger.

“You think I’m a fool, don’t you?” Elaine says.

“No!” says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.

“It’s just that . . . It’s that I . . . I need some time,” Elaine says.

(There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)

“Yes,” he says.

(Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.)

“Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?” she says.

“What way?” says Roger.

“That way about time,” says Elaine.

“Oh,” says Roger. “Yes.”

(Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)

“Thank you, Roger,” she says.

“Thank you,” says Roger.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it’s better if he doesn’t think about it. (This is also Roger’s policy regarding world hunger.)

The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.

Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine’s, will pause just before serving, frown, and say:

“Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?”

By Dave Barry

LOVE

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weakness.

Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future, and it doesn’t brood over the past. It’s the day-in and day-out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories and working toward common goals.

If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things that are missing. If you don’t have love in your life, no matter what else there is, it’s not enough.

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